Top Tips for a Lousy Sex Life

It’s a truism that women’s magazines encourage an approach to sex that isn’t very healthy. Sex is often portrayed in magazines like Cosmo as a mechanistic set of techniques to learn, much like auto repair or hooking up a stereo, that women must master or risk losing their men. Missing from these magazines is any sort of guidelines for healthy communication, or any accounting for the variation between people; men are portrayed as mysterious but somewhat simplistic animals who, if they are jiggled and poked at in the correct way, respond with orgasm (and, presumably, slavish devotion).

None of this is particularly news.

The Nerve magazine, however, has this awesome article about the 44 Most Ridiculous Sex Tips From Cosmo. Some of the winners include this gem:

2. “Tickle his feet with your nipples: climb on top of him in reverse cowgirl position, then bend over until your nipples reach the tops of his feet. …Yowzah.”

When this sounds spicy, you have hit new heights of erotic boredom.

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